When first browsing for vintage desserts (to make up for the fiasco that was the Jellied Bouillon From Hell), I thought this one said “Orange Velveeta Pie.” Ewww. Luckily, it actually says “Orange Velvet Pie.”
The recipe, posted to Flicr by Cowtools, is a suggested use of your OSTERIZER. (We’ll pretend my KRUPS blender is actually an OSTERIZER.)
Now, according to the recipe illustration, this is supposed to make a septagonal pie.
I’m not kidding, count the sides. I thought I was too tired, because it sure LOOKED like an octagon but I just couldn’t get the edges to add up. And for extra trippy goodness, it’s got five triangles radiating from the middle, making easy serving implausible. Since I believe that pi and pie are intricately linked, I instead approximated the pie as a circle. Reverse calculus! (Buzz tried to discuss theorems about the constructability of polygons at this point, which is when I realized we should probably just apologize for the mathiness and return you to your regularly scheduled retro recipe…)
The crust and chocolate garnish are pretty straightforward. The orange velvet part requires some overly complicated instructions.
3/4 cup whipping cream
3 eggs, separated
2 envelopes unflavored gelatin
1/4 cup water
1/2 cup hot water
3/4 cup sugar
6 oz. can orange concentrate
1/2 slice lemon, peeled
Dash of salt
2 tbsp. sugar for egg whites
9″ chocolate wafer pieshell
Method: Prepare your favorite chocolate wafer pie shell and set aside. Soften gelatin in cold water. Dissolve in hot water. Put the cream in the OSTERIZER container. Cover and mix at Lo Speed until thick. Spoon into a cup. Put egg yolks in glass container with any of the cream that adheres to the blades. Cover and run at Lo Speed until lemon colored. With the OSTERIZER running, add gelatin, sugar, salt, lemon, and orange concentrate, through the feeder cap opening in the cover. Turn to Hi Speed and mix until smooth. Beat egg whites with a rotary beater until foamy. Gradually add 2 tablespoons sugar. Fold the orange mixture into the egg whites. Fold in the whipped cream. Pour into chocolate wafer crust. Chill until set. Garnish with chocolate bits.
Yield: 9-inch pie
You’ll notice all those emphasized bits are cleverly interwoven descriptions of the wonderful feature of your lovely OSTERIZER blender. It has two speeds and an opening in the cover. You’ll also notice the speeds are named “Hi” and “Lo” — don’t want to confuse the fragile housewife brain with too many complicated letters…
I digress. When everything is dumped into the blender and blended at whatever speed it needs, it’s poured into my favorite chocolate wafer pie shell and chilled. Really not that hard.
However, I will note: don’t use your blender to make whipped cream. I thought it would be easy, but it turned out that a top layer was perfectly whipped, a middle layer which was partially solidified but mostly liquid, and a bottom layer (most in contact with the blades) was thoroughly curdled. The partially-whipped cream would have been fine, but chunks of fat are extremely disgusting in whipped cream; I had to whip up more with my mixer to replace it, before folding everything together.
I added some chocolate curls to the top. (Eight of them. Take that, assymetry.)
The taste and consistency is exactly what you’d expect from orange juice, whipped cream, egg whites, and a bit of gelatin. But the amount of ingredients and work required for is crazy, considering that you would get the same result with orange Jell-O whipped and folded with whipped cream — which has the additional advantage of no raw eggs for the egg-wary.
It’s also really a Yellow Velvet Pie; a few drops of red food coloring would have helped.
If you’ve got time on your hands and an OSTERIZER that’s gathering dust, this might be worth trying. It certainly tasted fine🙂 However, the recipe certainly was created by an appliance company trying to oversell its product. Blenders are great for a few things, but not everything.